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Surviving in sheer disfavor

I have been challenged by unique circumstances every day of my life so far. It isn't the Devil, it's God. What is God doing? I don't know. I do know that it seems as though he were destroying me. I don't do anything wrong. I watch pornography. That's it. My Dad's untimely demise is because I watched a porno. I got chronic pain for 7 years because of it too. I got shot, imprisoned, diseased, impoverished, and without basic necessities, because I watched a porno.

That's absurd. Porn, so what? It means you're a venial filthy person. I don't think the filthiness is a mortal sin. But yeah, people need to get back to Mass. The Devil is not capable of harming us. Maybe if I were weak in faith. But I'm not, the Devil has no dominion here. For some reason, God gave my Dad dementia. Remember, I was depending on my Dad to do IWM. We had it planned for 7 years. Lol. There that number is again. "7."

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